I guess summer isn't over yet!

It may be October, but my little balcony garden isn't done trying yet.

I guess little gardens produce little fruits? Check out the bountiful mini produce I'm getting:

That big green pepper is almost a normal size!

Yaaay Fall!

I'm diving right into this cold weather! This past weekend i made not one, but 2 delicious and hearty soups/stews. (in other words, i've been procrastinating with my studying).

I'm a big supporter of "one pot" cooking. So i make lots of soupy stewy type meals, intended to be eaten in a bowl, because I'm also a big fan of spooning. I should also mention that i make up recipes as i go, so sometimes they could use improvement.

Saturday, we had:
Butternut Squash, Apple, Sausage, and Tortellini Soup

Chopping list:

• 2 lbs butternut squash, 1/2 inch to 1 inch pieces (i used the pre-cut kind, it was actually cheaper!)
• 1 or 2 apples, diced ( i used 3, too many i think.)
• 1 small potato, peeled and diced (i used red, but shouldn't matter much)
• 1 medium onion, diced

Other:

• 3 links sweet italian sausage, casings removed
• 1 package frozen cheese tortellini
  
• 1/2 tsp herbs de provence ( i have this one with a built in grinder and i love it... i definitely bought it at a regular grocery store, but i don't know which one)
• 1/4 tsp pumpkin pie spice
• 1 carton (4 cups?) chicken broth
• water... enough to cover what chicken broth can't
• a little butter? (i didn't use, but would have been a good flavor addition)

Optional:

• 1 beer for enjoying while cooking
• music (optional) for singing and dancing while cooking (I used a combination of Ella Fitzgerald and "Rhythms del Mundo: Cuba)
  
• Blender (I looooove my kithen aid immersion blender)

Instructions:

• Open beer
• Cue music (Que? Queue?)
  
• In large pot, brown and crumble sausage. Anyone know a good way of doing this? I end up with giant chunks, but it doesn't really matter, since they're still delicious.
• Sip beer. Start nodding your head to the music.
  
• When fully cooked, remove sausage, put in a bowl, and set aside.
• In same large pot, now greased with sausage juices, add onions and spices and saute until onions begin to turn translucent. I bit of butter would be good to add here for increased flavor, but I didn't think of it at the time.
• Sing into your beer bottle microphone.
  
• Add remaining vegetables. Stir well.
• Add broth and enough water to cover vegetables. Dance a bit while it comes to a boil, then some more after reducing to a simmer, stirring occasionally, until the vegetables are fork tender.
• If you want a creamy soup, remove from heat and submerge immersion blender, or blend small amounts at a time in a traditional blender.
• Place back on medium heat, add in sausage and 1 bag of frozen cheese tortellini. Cook until tortellini is warmed through. Dance and finish beer to speed along the process.
  
• Salt and pepper to taste, and serve!
• Yum!

Sunday, we had:
Mustard and Beer Beef Stew

Chopping list:

• 1 small potato, skin on, chopped
  
• 1 medium onion, diced
• few carrots, peeled and chopped
• few stalks of celery, chopped

Other:

• Stew meat, doesn't really matter how much... i use a package. 1.5 pounds maybe?
• Beer (darker is better), not for drinking this time.
• Mustard of choice, ~2 tsps (i used a combo of "cuban mojo" and brown mustard)
• 1 carton (4 cups) beef broth or stock
• 1 Bay leaf (i forgot, would have been good)
• 1/2 tsp of herbs de provence or oregano, or maybe sage?
  
• bit of olive oil

Optional:

• half a kielbasa or smoked sausage, chopped

Instructions

• In large pot, add a bit of oil, and brown stew meat. Cut up into bite size cubes as is easiest for you... i use tongs and kitchen shears while they're browning to save time.
  
• when done browning, add mustard of choice, stir well.
• Add sausage, if including.
  
• Add half the beer, stir well. Cook a bit over medium low heat.
• Add onions, stir well, let cook a bit.
• Add a little bit of herbs de provence
  
• Add remaining vegetables, stir well, cook until onions are translucent.
• Add broth and bay leaf
• Cook for a while... until the potatoes start to fall apart
• Make sure beef is fully cooked
• Remove bay leaf
• Salt and pepper to taste
  
• Serve! With remaining half beer perhaps?
  

Smelled funny while cooking (due to the weird mustard i used) but turned out well. Even more tasty a day later!

Pea-nuuuut, peanut butter! (and jelly!)

I don't know about you, but wonderbread has always held a special place in my heart, even though it tastes like nothing and has no nutritional value whatsoever. When it comes to a comfort food sandwich (peanut butter and jelly or fluff, grilled cheese, old school tuna salad, to cite a few), there's just no acceptable substitute.

UNTIL NOW!

I've discovered fiber-one country white bread. Still super processed I'm sure, still fairly flavorless, but now with nutrition! Or at least a little. Fills the same role, with less guilt :)

Yay!

so much in my head!

I've gotten myself into trouble.

I started a blog because i really like how it makes me feel when i write, i'm just not very good at writing. I started writing about me and food, because it's one of the most important relationships in my life, and i'm 100% certain that I am not the only one that this applies to. And I started drawing pictures because it's fun.

I don't have time for fun anymore. What happened?

I still think about food, constantly.
I still think about how i would like to have fun, constantly.
I still try my best to have fun whenever i can, constantly.
I still fail at having fun and doing my best, constantly.
Or do i?
Maybe i am doing my best.
I certainly try hard enough...

Firstly... I've failed at being a blogger. That sounds silly to say.. "blogger" is such and ugly word. But that's how it is... I don't have time! I can't even succeed at defining myself as this ugly word! (maybe that's a blessing in diguise, haha). Not only that, but i've been trying not to think about food (since my pants don't fit...) but how can you write about food if you're trying your darndest not to think about it? Just writing this makes me hungry... imagine how hungry i get writing more interesting excerpts about food. Or imagine how many cookies i could have baked (let alone eaten) in the time it takes me to write this?

Unfortunatly, I don't feel like restraining myself from thinking and writing about food has made me any better at other aspects of my life. I still feel overwhelmed, ALL THE TIME!!! What happened to me that i feel unable to deal with the curve balls life decides to throw my way? As I said to my friend earlier today: Maybe i should consider myself successful given that i've made it this far and haven't yet had a mental breakdown? How do YOU define success? I'd like to know, maybe it will help me to put things in perspective!

PS - I had a wonderful evening with friends. I had fun, which is one of my goals. Having fun as reminded me how often i am dissatisfied with myself for worrying about things, when i could be letting them slip aside and focusing on the fun. But where's the fun in studying for a licensing exam? or trying to decide if you want to buy a house in this failing economy, when you might not have a job in 6 months? The fun is in the kitchen. No matter what's going on in the world around me, the fun is in the cookies... the wine and cheese... the seasonal berry cobblers. So why am i trying to distance myself from food? If i love food, i should embrace it! Not indulge in the traditional american sense of overeating, but indulge in the pleasure and appreciation!

I have baby tomatoes! Here's a picture of me watering my babies:
and here's what it would look like if i watered real babies:
Moral of the story (though incomplete): Appreciate what's there. As long as you're trying, there's no point in worrying about the rest! Love what you can, be happy anyway.

There, now I feel better!

PPS - now that i read back through, it seems as if i were imaginarily watering babies with the intent to harvest. This is not the case! The only baby product i'd consider harvesting would be baby giggles.

stick it to the man!

I just ate a bunch of oreos for breakfast because i'm mad at my dental insurance. Tooth decay and all that. (in hindsight, this will probably backfire on me, but it tasted good!)

Understand your policy before you go to the dentist! We have a new insurance this year, from husbands office. We found out the hard way that we're only covered for $1000 per year (that's roughly a cleaning and 2 metal fillings), and that even though they say we're covered for major work at 50% (up to the $1000 of course), we're pretty much not covered for anything, ever. They have this sneaky little "waiting period" set up so that you don't qualify for any major work (crowns, root canals, bridges, etc) until after you've been a member for a year*

*more specifically, until after EVERYONE IN YOUR OFFICE has been a member for a year! ie, when we switch to my company's dental in the fall (which there is no doubt we'll be doing) everyone in husband's office will have to restart their waiting periods! Isn't that absurd?!?! How do these insurance companies get away with these things!!???!!??

Rant complete.

Cookie's Revenge

I broke my tooth on a cookie. OOOooohh, the irony!!

I bit lovingly into a soft chocolate chip cookie, and suddenly i felt like i was eating a rock (not typically found in soft delicious chocolate chip cookies). A porcelain filling came out! and then, THEN, i bit down on the broken filling, and broke ANOTHER filling! And it's all the cookie's fault! Or maybe the dentist's. I think I'll blame the dentist. Grrrrr!!! Two holes in my mouth! And no cookies, because I'm afraid to eat! :(

Where the heck did June go?

Ok, so i've been a terrible blogger. But that doesn't mean i've been neglecting my cookies. Actually, I think I OD'd on cookies yesterday, i even woke up with a belly ache in the middle of the night that i fear may have been cookie induced. I love my country, I love my cookies.

I've been so busy! I don't even know what I've done in the past month of not blogging. Well i guess i do know if i stop to think about it... i've gained a few pounds. So, number one on the list of things i've done this month is eat.

Things I've done this month:
1. Eat
2. Work A LOT
3. Bake
4. Eat baked goods
5. Drive to Boston and back in one day
6. Throw a Bridal Shower (well, helped throw)
7. Host friends from Spain
8. Run around like crazy trying to make up for working instead of entertaining friends from Spain
9. Work some more
10. Totally failed to go to the gym or pool
11. Took friends kayaking on 4th of July (yay not in nyc!)
12. Missed 4th of July fireworks, disappointing visitors :(
13. Ate cookies
14. Slept roughly 20 of the first 28 hours after friends went back to Spain
15. Sweat. It's f*ing hot out!
16. Also, somewhere in there was father's day?
17. And a tree fell on my parents house
18. And my sister moved back to Boston and started her job! Yippee!

still to come: Friend's Bachelorette, Mom's surgery, and friend's wedding!

I'm out of time to make a picture. Maybe next time!

I grew 3 greenbeans!

My greenbean plants died. I'm not sure what happened, but they are no longer of this world. BUT, while pulling up the dead plants, i found 3 beans! They looked a little dried out and sketchy to me, but my sister's boyfriend rinsed one off and ate it! He declared it delicious. I'll take it! Gardening success! (hey, there's a way to spin everything, right?)

I had a wonderful weekend with my sister and her boyfriend visiting. We even went to the beach! It was great! (see right). Then my sunscreen exploded at dinner and i peed my pants with it. What can you do, that dress is ruined. So the next day we went shopping! Unfortunately not for a new sunscreen-free dress, but for my sister's new work clothes, because she got a job! Hooray Sissy!! She's moving back to Boston next week, where I hope she'll be very happy :)

Though my sister is spending her last week of freedom in my apartment, I am not. Horrible timing, but duty calls and I am in Charleston, West Virginia for the week. Fun, right? Actually, it might not be so bad, i get to drive around a lot (and i like driving), the weather is nice (so far) and everything is super lush and green and hilly, seems pleasant (since my allergies aren't bugging me yet, can't say the same for my coworker!). I might even get to set foot in Ohio tomorrow, my first time in WV and OH! Checking off those states one by one... I was almost in Virginia today! (At least i think it's in VA...) I spent 4 hours sitting in the DC airport, looking at the Washington Monument out the window, waiting for our tiny 2 propeller plane to show up. Luckily, i've been to both VA and DC before, so i don't have to have an inner battle about whether 4 hours in the airport counts as me being in VA. Phew!

I went to spain!

I'm having a problem. Actually, I'm having several problems.

1. For the first time ever, i have pink eye! gross!!
2. I have pink eye in BOTH EYES! iiiick!
3. I have a partialy stuffy nose
4. Because of this partially stuffy nose, i have little to no sense of taste or smell
5. Because i can only barely taste anything, i can't stop eating everything in the kitchen to see if i can taste it.

Luckily, none of these problems started until Sunday. Which means, i didn't have any of these problems on my trip to Spain! (Though it seems spain may have caused the problems. they all started on the airplane ride home...)

Spain was AWESOME!! Lots of great people, lots of great sights, and lots, and lots, and lots of great food. (My pants were loose when i left the US, but they were tight when i came back. Crap! Totally worth it though!)

Vacation food highlights:
- one of our hosts made us a savory zuchinni flan, served cold with a tomato and onion chutney. AWESOME! Unfortunately i couldn't eat too much of it, because right before, he served us:
- some kind of gazpacho (has a different name, but i can't find it anwhere) with hard boiled eggs blended in, served with extra chopped up eggs and jamon serrano. Mmmm!
- i love manchego.
- nobody eats manchego WITH jamon, one or the other.
- they drink a lot of yogurt in spain. It's not kefir, it's watery yogurt. I got yelled at several times for suggesting it might be like kefir.
- I'm dissapointed in churros. Maybe i didn't have very good ones?
- chocolate (drink) is awesome. regular chocolate (to eat) is awesome too, of course.
- marzipan can be delicious!
- cheap wine tastes good, unlike in the US.
- tapas are great, you get to try everything!
- cafe bombo/bonbon is delicious. espresso with condensed milk.
- pa amb tomaquet is a great idea.
- patates braves are basically spicy fries. even husband didn't know this.
- best place to drink a beer: on the beach in barcelona
- i tried paella for the first time, pretty tasty. Reminds me of really good chinese fried rice, but don't tell this to anyone in spain, they hate chinese food. Guess the chinese restaurants there suck?
- tiny whole fried calamari are delicious. Don't think about the fact that you're eating their brains.
- tiny whole fried fish are disgusting. Think about the fact that you're eating their brains, and scales, and fins, and everything.
- tortillas are not the flat wraps that we know in the US via mexico, they are (usually potato filled) omeletts. They can be delicious!
- i had nothing healthy for breakfast every day! Sometimes a croissant, sometimes an ensaimada, sometimes a sandwich, sometimes all of the above!
- i ate this weird black rice sausage-like thing, it was delicious! Turns out the black was blood. Gross! (but still delicious!)
- i got to try a cake that's made in santiago only on holy years, which is rumored to be about once every 10 years, but i really have no idea about these things. It was an almond cake, and very tasty! Do you think i'll get in trouble if i try to make it on a non-holy year?

What the heck man?

Here's a picture of what I've looked like over the past few years:

What the heck man? If I'm only 5 pounds more than I was when I was thin, why the heck don't I look good? I look like I've had children, but I have not! Cookies yes, children no.
Also, maybe it's the hair.

chuga-chuga-CHOO-CHOO!

I'm melting! I've been subconsciously sabotaging my weight loss regime (judging by the amount of cake i ate this weekend, amongst other things) yet i lost weight this week anyway! amazing! And, more importantly, MY PANTS FIT!! well, almost. Only some of them, haha. But huge milestone!

I'm writing this on the train home, where i've treated myself to a beer. Probably not good to be balancing work laptop on my lap in a moving vehicle while drinking an open bottle of beer, but i'm a good multitasker. Here's a picture!

Now i have to go work on my PE application. Deadline is Saturday, but self inflicted deadline based on endorser availability is TOMORROW (Thursday) 4 PM! Aaacckk! I probably won't make it, but i should try. Penalty if i miss it? 6 months more of free time and studying, but 6 month delay in adulthood.

PS - i spent so much time rushing around with my application that i didn't have time to draw a picture and post! But, to celebrate the fact that I FINISHED MY APPLICATION IN TIME(!!!) I had another beer on the train the next day. And a candy bar. Take THAT weight loss!

Shoot, i think i already wore this shirt this week

and it's bright orange, people might notice! At least i don't smell bad. There's one old guy in our office who smells really bad, pretty much every day. Do you think it's because he's old and his nose stopped working? Or maybe he's been wearing the same shirt a whole lot more than once per week. This could be. He wears a white button down shirt every day... maybe it's the same one over and over! If only he'd wear bright orange like me, then i'd be able to tell. But if he wore bright orange, he'd look like a pumpkin. He's really short, under 5 feet i'd say, and also has a beach-ball belly, and he walks in slow motion, like a turtle (I'm tempted to draw a picture of this, but i think that would push me over the line from being observant and concerned to being mean and hyper-critical). Poor old man. I'm glad i'll never be a short old man. Short crochety old lady, perhaps, but hopefully i'll have my belly and my "scent" under control. I think i want to be an old lady that smells like soap... good goal? What do you think?

Speaking of controlling my belly, i've lost 5 pounds this month! Hooray! Only 10 more to go until my pants fit again! haha. But, it might be a while, since to celebrate this weeks' continued weight loss i ate 2 cupcake ice cream cones (best idea ever! similar to these, over at my sister and her friends' food blog), a big cookie, and a bite or two of cake. Man i love cookies.

Tastes like...

I've been really sick. The kind of sick where you can't taste ANYTHING, and therefore haven't been very hungry... hence the lack of food-related-blog-post enthusiasm.

However, over the past few days i've slowly regained my sense of smell (and therefore taste), and similarly, slowly decimated the contents of my kitchen cabinets. It's like my tongue has a mind of it's own!

Mmmm, Beer!

So I have a new friend. He’s irish, his name is Guinness (weird first name, right?). Anyway, Guinness is great. Lot’s of fun! Low calorie (so i'm told), and filling at the same time. When I was new to beer, I thought he was gross. But now I’ve realized he’s a really well rounded guy.

This past week, I rejoined Weight Watchers. Everyone always joins on the worst weekends (because what week ISN’T a bad week to go on a diet?), and we had friends visiting from Spain, which meant lots of eating out around town. So instead of eating, I drank guinness and espresso (i made a picture!). Filling, yet guilt free. So what if they leech all of the nutrients out of my body? (I’m just kidding mom and dad, I ate lots of fruit and healthy foods before and after…but I digress)

Today, my coworkers talked me into going out for a drink after work. Sounds like good fun, but I was hesitant since my commute is on the “rather long” side. But, I gave in, since it’s been a long, long while since I've gone out after work. My co-worker’s boyfriend owns a great pub downtown, and today was the first day of the season for which they opened up the outdoor seating. It was wonderful! We sat outside drinking Guinness and wine for HOURS! (see same picture, but substitute non-cubans, beer, and bar food). I meant to go home early, but who can leave smiling, laughing friends and magically refilling pints? Ok, so I only had 1 and a half. But that’s a lot for me. And I was about to leave, when bar owner (coworker’s boyfriend) said, “hey! Who wants some wine??". So we had some great wine from a wine bar across the street, and my efforts to go home were again pushed aside. Poor husband. Working late and studying, eating leftover cabbage soup (booooooring), while I was dining on Guinness, Cabernet, corned beef and swiss sliders, steak on toast, and lamb “lollipops”. Oh, and 100 calorie pack Cheetos, because I planned ahead and packed a snack for the train. Delicious!

Also, I lost 4 pounds during my first week of Weight Watchers! Thank you Guinness and espresso! (again, just kidding mom and dad, lots of healthy food.)

I just ate eight oreos

My coworker and I agreed last week that we would join weight watchers tomorrow. I hadn't planned on having a go-crazy-you're-about-to-lose-your-freedom binge, but i just ate everything in the kitchen. And had a beer.

But i decided this is ok, if i'm all puffed up from too much sugar, i'll weigh extra tomorrow. Which means when i go back in a week, and i don't weigh extra, i'll feel like i lost a whole bunch more weight than i actually did! Right? It's all about setting things up for big confidence boosts.

I don't feel like drawing any pictures today, but here's a picture of green beans i planted, after only 7 days (they're even taller now!) That's my thumb, as a size gauge.

And here's a close-up of how they open, the leaves come right out of the seed! Looks like an alien, or maybe that bird from "Up!" bagobblegok!

Spring is here!

Last Fall, i embarked on several experiments planting seeds i got for free from my kitchen. Thanks to this, i have several gimpy baby lemon trees, some crazy tall ginger (with a really ugly, but unique flower), and 2 pots of bell peppers! Unfortunately, i planted the bell peppers in September... one pot red, one pot green, so they got to be about 4 inches tall and stopped growing for the winter. I got about a bajillion plants in one pot, and one, single, lonely plant in the other. Since they haven't had a chance to take a stab at making babies yet, i have no idea which is which! They weren't so happy about the whole "winter" thing, but lately they've perked up. That's how i know spring is here!

This year, since i have a teeny tiny bit of outdoor space, i'm attempting to grow my own food, round two! It will probably absorb all the scary chemicals and pollutants out of the city air, but hey, can't knock it till you try it. Who knows, maybe pollution is a super flavor booster!

So far i'm hoping to grow an assortment of herbs including parsley, lavender, and chives (basil, rosemary, and lemon verbena survived the winter in my windowsill! They're really, really ugly right now, but alive and green!), bell peppers, tomatoes, hot peppers, and green beans, and strawberries! I would grow a whole lot more, but my balcony is only about 10 square feet. And i'm hoping i'll be able to sit on it once in a while. Husband and i have been debating whether or not there is room for 2 chairs and a small table. Considering that the balcony has 4 sides, 3 of which are doors, and one of which is railing... it's not looking good. But i think we'll do it anyway :)

Bread Fail

I broke out Mom's ancient bread machine. It looks like R2D2, only white. Who ever thought a bucket shaped loaf of bread was a good idea? Well i'll tell you this, it sure smells like a good idea.

I've never used a bread machine before. But lately i've been trying to make bread, and making an enormous mess, so i figured, why not? For similar reasons (ie, why not) i've decided to make rye bread on the machine's maiden voyage. Ok, so it's not really a maiden. But 15+ years of sitting on a shelf have given it back it's virginity - it's out of practice. Unfortunately, it seems the machine really is out of practice. Either that, or the recipe i used for rye bread was crap. Tastes like fresh bread... but not very rye-y, nor delicious. Tastes like wheat bread, and a little bit burnt.

Bread Machine (similar robot model):

R2D2:

I wonder if r2d2 can make bread? Wasn't really a skill showcased in any of the movies, but could be useful. Stranded on a cold desert planet? No worries, robot makes delicious fluffy bread from scratch. I'll have to ask husband, he'll know.

Coffee Love

I think the coffee boy has a crush on me.

I don't drink coffee very often (only when i feel like i won't make it until lunch time) but apparently that's been happening a little too often lately. I've never observed the coffee boy to be particularly social, but this morning when i walked in later than usual (wasted 90 minutes upstairs trying to convince myself that i didn't need coffee) he said "oh, hey!" and had memorized my order! And then he gave me a special cardboard cup colder advertising nurse jackie (you know, so you don't burn your hands) before going over to get more milk out of the refrigerator. All the while, continuing to look at me and smile. Which was awkward, since there was a tower of super processed packaged pastries in the way.

It made me smile. Too bad he's not the register boy, then maybe i could get free coffee...

Don't worry husband, all you have to do is learn how to make coffee and i'll stick with you. (Just kidding! I love you! You made me brownies!)

Meal Time, all the time!

I ate my lunch an hour ago. It's like i'm in high school again! Maybe that's why i can never make it all the way between meals without a snack, i was trained through 12 years of public school education that breakfast is at 6:45, and lunch is at 10:45. 2nd lunch is at 3 or 4, and dinner is at 6. That's pretty much the same schedule i still adhere to, only most meals shifted slightly such that 1st lunch is now called 2nd breakfast.

chili for chile?

All these news reports about Chile have been making me want chili. I know they're unrelated, and that's probably insensitive of me, but they sound the same! Plus, at least it means i'm thinking about the trouble in Chile. It's my equivalent of praying... i'm not religious, so i don't say prayers for people, instead i send my thoughts, and things like that. So last night, we ate chili, inspired by Chile.

Ok, so maybe it's REALLY inspired by Mexico. Regardless of where it originated, chili is a wonderful thing. It comes in so many varieties, and they're all wonderful in their own way. In it's simplest form, chili (or chile) refers to the peppers themselves. A bowl of green chile is basically a bowl full of chopped up stewed green peppers. A bowl of tex mex chili is basically a bowl full of meat stewed in dried chili powders and tomato. MY chili is of my own making, with no specific recipe.

My general plan involves a bit of oil, garlic, onions, bell peppers, sometimes a spicy pepper of some kind, diced tomatoes, at least one can of beans, cumin, and chili powder. And I usually prepare some kind of meat on the side, as simple as browned ground beef, for the husband to mix into his serving. Sometimes i cook it with meat, but usually not. I'm a veggie chili kind of girl (I prefer my meat on a bun with cheese and ketchup). There are many nice things about this dish, one being that it's so easy to prepare, with no real rules, and a fairly short cooking time. Basically i throw everything in a pot (starting with garlic and onions in oil), and let it cook until it's the right consistency, somewhere between 15 and 60 minutes. Flexible, my kind of cooking.

Another good thing about cooking chili is that it always, without fail, makes me feel better. Whether it's mental or physical, wielding a knife, reaping the delicious rewards, and clearing out my head a bit with the spice never fails to improve my status. Mood problem? chop chop chop! Sad? Emotional and guilt free (super healthy!) eating. Sick? Lots of vitamins and sinus clearing.

Last night i tried adding chipotle peppers in adobo to the chili, something i've never cooked with before. I didn't realize that the tiny cans contain more than one WHOLE chipotle pepper! Seeds and all! I wasn't sure what to do, so i tried my best to scrape out the seeds, and chopped up the rest of one pepper, adding it and a couple of teaspoons of sauce to the chili pot. Holy cow what a spicy mess that made on the counter! I wonder what the normal way of using chipotle is? I'd already added a bunch of chili powder to the chili, so i'm not really sure what it would have tasted like using chipotle instead of chili powder, but i did notice that it made the chili much more smoky-sweet than usual. I also used fire-roasted tomatoes instead of regular diced tomatoes, so it's possible that they contributed to the smoky sweet flavor. I'll have to try again using only 1 unknown ingredient! All in all the chili was a sucess, sprinkled with shredded cheese for me, and over rice and meat for the husband. I wish i'd had some corn to throw in, i think that would have made it a more complete bowl of flavors. Still, it made a great burrito for lunch today!

Grocery Store vs Those Other Stores

Somebody's lunch smells delicious! Unfortunately, it isn't mine. I've got a boring, healthy lunch, with the hopes that it will help me fit into my pants a little better. On the plus side, i finally finished those gross "greek" yogurts, and restocked on non-gross greek yogurts at the grocery store last night.

I love the grocery store. It's one of my favorite places to go! It's much more fun than regular shopping, since i don't have to worry about whether the food will fit in my mouth (as opposed to over my thighs), of COURSE it will!

Aisles and aisles of possibilities... most of them delicious. Also, in the grocery store, i feel like i'm rich. I'm not, i'm a normal person, but if i wanted to, i could buy anything in the grocery store. Not EVERYTHING, but ANYTHING. Not that i would, but that i could if i found something i just had to have! I don't feel that way when i go regular shopping, i'm a sale rack shopper. I cringe if an item of clothing is over $10. But in the supermarket, hardly anything is over $10! And if it is, it feels like a tremendous splurge, how's that for bargain endulgences? $10 fancy olive oil, $1000 fancy jacket... easy decision.

Mermelada de Guayaba

When my husband's mother came to visit us from Cuba, she brought a can of guava marmalade with her. Yes, a tin can of marmalade. Seems like somethings wrong with this picture, a can? of marmalade? A jar sure, but a can? Turns out in cuban (ok, so maybe spanish) marmalade isn't really a jelly, it's more like a syrup.

My husband was super excited, he opened the can and ate the stuff with a spoon. He also eats condensed milk with saltines, so i thought maybe this was one of his weird cuban things. However, one of my friends recently went to Costa Rica and came back raving about this guava syrupy stuff they served at her hotel. I'd been on the lookout for cans of "marmelade" for my husband, so i doubled my efforts, curious to find something for both husband and friend.

I'm a big fan of guava juice from time to time, so i decided to try the guava jelly i found in the spanish aisle at the super market. It's tasty, but definitely not what husband and friend were talking about. Then i stumbled upon this in the peanut butter and jelly aisle at Stop & Shop, and it's delicious! Husband doesn't eat it with a spoon since it's still a little too spreadable, but it's DELICOUS! Bought some for friend, and she agrees that it's very much like what she was eating in Costa Rica... not quite as syrupy, but same flavor. It's great on toast, or in any combination with cheese (popular cuban dessert: chunks of guava paste with chunks of cream cheese, great flavor, but i have trouble just eating chunks of cream cheese!).

Try some! The brand's website is weird, but like i said, i get mine at Stop & Shop (and it seems to be slightly cheaper there too... though not cheap, a little under $5 for a smallish jar, but it's worth it!)

PS - the real cuban thing would definitely not say "no sugar added", maybe that's the real reason husband isn't eating this stuff with a spoon?

Chocolate covered (sugar?) plums

I had some of these for 2nd breakfast.  They're delicious!  Probably not the healthiest choice for breakfast, especially since i had way more than 1 serving, but delicious nonetheless!  Plus, they're partially fruit!  (why do people think dried plums sound delicious and prunes sound gross?  Same thing!  Both extra tasty when covered in chocolate!)

Warning

This yogurt is pretty gross.  I bought a few assuming they were greek yogurt, thinking that their claim of being made with rBST/rBGH free milk couldn't hurt. 

Unfortunately, after tasting and going "blegch" i read the ingredients list, and apparently it's not greek yogurt.  It's regular yogurt with a bunch of stuff added to make it think and greek-like.  Texture is horrible...chalky maybe?  Don't buy these.

grrrrllluuaaa (stomach growling)

I'm starving!!  My stomach is talking to me, it has a mind of it's own.  And it's saying "don't eat healthy food, get me some lasagna!"  I know it's only 10:30, but the cranky old man in my belly doesn't care about acceptable dining behaviors.  I offered him a yogurt, but who in their right mind would accept yogurt when they want lasagna?  Not this cranky belly, i can tell you that.  I tried little coffee with lots of milk and sugar (wear down the attitude with some sugar and acid?) but it only made him angrier.  Maybe carrot sticks or a nectarine will have more success?  Not likely.  I might have to go out and get some lasagna for 2nd breakfast.

Maybe I can appease him by detailing my weekend food adventures?  Saturday I made my own chicken stock! (not good enough for the cranky old man, but i was plenty happy!)  I used this recipe (using chicken breasts!), and it turned out very well.  I also made bread, tried to use a recipe with no milk (basically yeast, water, sugar, and as much flour as i could get in there), but then i let it rise for way too long, it collapsed, and i came out with a weird foccacia-like brick.  As it's aging, it's getting less crusy and is actually not so bad.

With my stock-remnant boiled chicken breasts, I decided to try making a buffalo chicken dip.  I modified the recipe a bit, forgot about the vinegar, and used feta cheese instead of blue (gross!).  It turned out pretty good, but i think i went a little too heavy handed on the hot sauce!  We have lots leftover, so I used a bunch of my fresh chicken stock to make potato soup, into which we mixed spoonfulls of the leftover buffalo chicken dip for a spicy chicken & cheese potato soup.  Was pretty tasty!  More for dinner tonight... and probably every night for the rest of the week, haha. 

I also made chocolate cookies!  They were delicious!  But we already ate them all.

Whatever it is I think I see...

Lollipop, lollipop, oooo, Lolli-lollipop! How many licks does it take to reach the center of a tootsie pop? not very many when you're eating one of these mini ones, i can tell you that much.

One of my coworkers was selling chocolate bars for his son's school for a dollar this morning. After lunch, i dug out a dollar, getting pretty excited about getting a chocolate bar, only to find out the chocolate bars had already gone home to start their weekend! Boooo! most people in my office are on a 4.5 day week, so i'm pretty much the only one here right now. And chocolate-less. Until i remembered my mini toostie roll pops! Phew!!

Tootsie roll, tootsie roll chocolatey chew...tootsie roll i think i'm in love with you! (I just looked up the first half of that lyric, and what a let down. They couldn't come up with anything better than "tootsie roll tootsie roll chocolatey chew?")

punxsutawny THIS!

Winter is ending! Major snow storm this weekend? Who cares! When i walked to work this morning, i got sun on me! Yippeee!

It can keep snowing, i like snow. But mostly i like sunshine. Sunshine + snow = even brighter sunshine!

Whenever I see pictures of groundhogs (did you know that last year Staten Island Chuck bit Mayor Bloomberg?!) they remind me of the gopher in winnie the pooh. I wouldn't trust him to tell me when spring is coming... all he's good at is digging holes, falling down them, whistling, and using dynamite, while pooh eats honey.

Speaking of honey, there's a rumbly in my tumbly....

Shake shake shake

I'm trying to make myself like soymilk. I'm addicted to yogurt and cheese, but lactaid pills are kind of expensive and i'm trying to learn to like soymilk for things like coffee and cereal. For my belly, i've been trying to avoid caffeine, but sometimes i get a giant craving for a sweet beverage. So imagine my delight when i found a packet of carnation instant breakfast in my desk drawer this morning, next to the rice krispies! (well, rice krispie wannabees, puffed brown rice, blegh). So, off to the kitchen i went, to mix up a chocolate soy instant breakfast. GIANT FAILURE! A. Nothing to shake with, B. Tasted really gross, and lumpy.

Maybe carnation instant breakfasts are a bad idea to begin with, aren't they full of chemicals? Chemical vitamins... but chemicals nonetheless.

I've been wondering lately if i should give my body a "clense", like go vegan for a week, see if i can survive, and see if i feel healthier. But let's be realistic, i can't go vegan. Or even vegetarian, i love me some cheeseburgers.

So instead, maybe i should focus on ridding my life of one terrible food... but what food? What food can i eliminate from my diet, with the biggest health impact? Processed meat? White flour? Cookies? (Forget it!) What's the worst food out there? Probably hot dogs. They taste pretty good sometimes though... but maybe i could give up processed meat... no cold cuts, no hot dogs, no sausage? What do you think? Are there any decent hot dogs substitutions out there? Maybe a hot dog roll with some roast pork, saurkraut, and mustard would work... what about kielbasa? Any substitutes for that? Would fresh sausage from the butcher (or butcher department) be allowed?

PS - Why do vegans think that fake chicken patties are healthier than real chicken patties? Are they really? I can't see how fake food could ever be more healthy than real food...

First times

So everyone raves about these, but i never tried them until today. I don't know if it's lucky coincidence, but i will definitely be trying them a 2nd time!

I decided to put as many zero-effort items into the crockpot as i could find, and see how it came out. So i combined:

1/2 a bag of frozen chopped onions and green peppers
1/2 a bag of frozen chopped butternut squash
2 frozen chorizo (or so i thought, i think they were the similarly named portuguese sweet sausages)
2 frozen portabella asagio sausages
1 can of diced fire roasted tomatoes
1 can white beans
1 container of chicken broth
several turns of salt and pepper grinders
some (few shakes?) of oregano or italian seasoning, chili powder, paprika, and garlic powder
1 package frozen cheese ravioli

Combine everything except beans and ravioli, and cook for 6-8 hours on low. Add beans and ravioli with about 1 hour remaining, voila! I took the sausage out right before serving and chopped up, but it's pre-cooked. There are no rules. Served with some parmesan because i had some. mmmm! What should i call it? Crock-pot-sausagy-soupy-breeze?

Maybe it's not the tomatoes... i've also never ever before used frozen chopped onions and green peppers, frozen chopped butternut squash, nor either type of sausage. But who cares, it was one of the easiest meals i've ever made, and delicious! Almost like a really great minestrone... only with ravioli and sausage, haha.

Mmm, snow!

I've been up since 6, and i'm only just getting to breakfast! As someone who used to eat cookies before she even got in the shower, this is mind boggling to me. For the past few months i've been taking some early morning meds that require me to wait 30 minutes before eating... by which time i've begun my commute. I feel bad eating on the train, so the 30 minute wait turns into an hour and 15... and then i don't want to eat while i'm walking as fast as i can through the streets of manhattan, so add another 20 minutes... plus however long it takes me to get settled in at the office. All in all, it took 3 hours and 45 minutes for me to settle down to breakfast today! I'm both proud and mortified, think of all those neglected cookies i could have eaten in that amount of time.

Word on the street is that if you don't eat within the first hour you're awake, your body goes into "starvation mode" and you have super slow metabolism for the rest of the day. Maybe THAT's why my pants don't fit! It's not the cookies, it's the medicine/commute combo!

Today I ate snowflakes on my walk to work, the snow was so crazy that all i had to do was open my mouth, but i did catch myself unconsciously sticking my tongue out a few times... i wonder if anyone saw? haha

PS - According to the Blogger timestamp i live in California... which makes it sound like i only had to wait 45 minutes to eat... and this is not the case.

get your motor runnin...

I am buzzed. Bzzzzzzz! Too much caffeine! Or sugar? Or bagel? I don't think bagels make you jittery, but you never know. I had a thing at the doctor yesterday where they drugged me up something good, and i've been pretty slow coming out of it. I was still tired this morning (though i think that was probably just because it's morning) so i decided i deserved not only a coffee, but a coffee with real sugar AND a bagel with butter. I only intended to eat half the bagel, but once i started drinking that coffee, my mind and mouth and eyes just took on a life of their own and now the bagel's gone. Maybe i'll go get some cheetos out of the vending machine like my receptionist did this morning? She sent another guy to get them for her, but he couldn't figure out which bag was the cheetos (???) so she came back to show him which ones she wanted. I asked her if it was too early for cheetos (9:30) and she answered "not for me!" Maybe we can be friends after-all! I love cheetos!

hungry hungry hippo

I find myself chanting "hungry, hungry hipp-Oh!" quite often. Hungry Hungry Hippo used to be one of my favorite games when i was little. Surprising? No way, it involved eating! Granted it wasn't me eating, but still, i was controlling the eating, without bustin' out of my kid pants. (Another favorite - ready, set, spaghetti!)

I wonder how many kids have tried eating the hippos' white marbles? I'm proud to say I don't think i ever did. But i'm pretty hungry right now, maybe i'd try one. Or maybe i'd be more fun to play the game with yogurt covered raisins or after dinner mints instead? Faux-healthy snacks, made into a game with multi-colored hippos! Even better!

Oooohh! Inspiration! Cheese-ball eating hungry hungry hippos! But holy cow (or holy hippo?) that would leave quite a mess to clean up. Licking the game platform? Probably not acceptable.

PS - that reminds me of something i wrote a long time ago...

Oh delicious round orb of orange, from what planet cometh thee? I don't really care, as long as you're here for me to eat. So what if you look like you're made out of toxic chemicals? So what if you taste like you definitely could be made out of toxic chemicals? If I someday find that I'm dying due to cheeto-induced radiation, it just might have been worth it.

Is it the cheese? The salt? The color that makes you so addictive? You smell a little bit like feet, but my craving seems to defy all common sense and eats you anyway... I don't eat other items that smell like feet! But the feeling you give my tounge is near orgasmic. Who needs vegetables? Can I count you as a vegetable? You're the same color as a carrot... and one of your main ingredients is vegetable oil...

I've proved many times that I cannot buy a package of cheese balls and eat just one serving... my will is not strong enough. But I'm glad that there is someone out there, be they man, machine, or alien, that can do it for me. Thank you 100-calorie-pack-maker-man!

PS - Once upon a time, many years ago, I tried smoking a certain weed. Many people claim that this causes them to crave orange things, and I now support this theory. I cried that night... because the super market was out of cheese balls.

Sweet!

These are delicious.

And a relatively healthy sweet tooth solution.

I just wanted to share.

I'm hungry! I'm not sure what i want to eat... all i know is that i want to eat! I'd like to share something I wrote a year ago, because it's still so true.

I have an addiction.

You might be sniggering, but this is no laughing matter. Well, I often giggle about it... but not right now.

Right now I feel guilty, like I'm having an affair. I haven't even overeaten today (yet)! Still, i can't stop thinking about food. When's it going to return my calls? Might we arrange a lunch date? There's a grocery store down the street, nobody would see us... I tell my self "It's ok, I've got protection..." Unfortunately Lactaid doesn't keep the fat from sticking.

The daydreams... What's for dinner? The possibilities are endless...

The memories... I bought fresh bread from the bakery, it's sitting on the counter looking pretty... it was delicious covered in butter (okay, it was lite butter) , the peanut butter was good too... and the jelly... should I make grilled cheese for dinner?

The return of the guilt... I should try to eat something healthier. There's an old low fat english muffin sitting next the the beautiful loaf of fresh bread, i could substitute that, add some fat-free styrofoam cheese and a "fried" egg, save many calories and compromise the flavor... And while it cooks I'll sneak seventeen slices of the seductive fresh loaf and pretend that I didn't. It will be so delicious! And I'll feel so guilty...

But this affair isn't easy to hide, the evidence is everywhere! There are the crumbs on the counter... the chocolate on my breath... the wrappers in the garbage... the dishes... the pants that don't fit...

Last night I realized we had no cookies in the house. I asked my husband if he could turn into a giant chocolate chip cookie for me (I was only half kidding). He said no, he didn't want other girls taking bites out of him as we walked down the street (have you seen that chocolate commercial?). What man doesn't want girls chasing after him with love bites? Do I deserve such a loyal man when I'm in the middle of a raging affair with cookies? chocolate? bread? cheese? It's not even an affair, it's an orgy!

I'm trying so hard to get my eating (and food-thinking) under control, but how do you control something that's this embedded in your head, your heart, and your social activities?

Anyone want to go out for wine and cheese?

Unfortunately, though it's been a year, I've made no progress. I've had my ups and downs, but I'm right back where I started. Hopefully 2nd (or is this 3rd?) times the charm!

mmm, mmm, mmm! Peppermint mocha's are god's gift to this commuter on holidays. Well, if there is a god... if there isn't then they're just my gift to myself :)


Peppermint mocha's (even with skim milk) are like a peppermint brownie in a cup. With a shot of caffeine. Can't even taste the coffee, it's great! At 4 ww points for a tall non-fat, no whip, 100% worth it on a day when the whole world seems to have the day off, yet i have a 10 am conference call. Who schedules conference calls on National Holidays? Canadians, that's who. Not a holiday for them either, i guess i should sympathize with them... especially since they'll help my morning go by faster!


Now if only I'd saved some of my peppermint mocha for the looming call...

H es por galletica

I just ate 3 cookies. 3 enormous chocolate cookies. For second breakfast. Shoot.



Was it worth it? Yep.
Do I regret it? Not yet.
Will I? Definitely.
Will it still have been worth it? Maybe.



But i wrote it down... that makes the calories not count as much, right? I used to be good at weight watchers. Now i'm just good at finding excuses to eat cookies. There are so many other things i could have eaten that would have been more delicious and healthier... but they're not cookies! My husband and I were just discussing last night how these cookies weren't particularly tasty cookies, but that doesn't seem to matter to me. They were cookie shaped. And tasted like cookies. Why doesn't somebody work on growing broccoli to be cookie shaped? I'd probably eat it if they marketed it as a cookie. Maybe I should try that cookie diet, since I have a seriously unhealthy cookie problem, and as long as they're cookies, they don't even have to taste good (which i'm sure the cookie diet cookies don't).

Why can't i have a vegetable obsession instead? Anyone out there want to hypnotize me to crave celery sticks instead of cookies? Should it have been my new years resolution to love vegetables as much as cookies? (good thing it wasn't because that's just nonsense! Cheese maybe, but vegetables HAH!)

Cookie's for breakfast!

Ok, well, maybe cookies aren't recommended for breakfast, but for 2nd breakfast! 2nd breakfast is one of my favorite times of day. Well, unless i've had cookies for 1st breakfast that is. Because if i have cookies for first breakfast, i fell guilty and slovenly by 2nd breakfast. I try to have healthy food for both 1st and 2nd breakfast, but some days cookies win. Like today. But it's ok, because it's my birthday!

I believe introductions are in order...

This is me, waving. Obviously, i did not inherit my mothers talent as an artist. However, it is rather true to form. My legs really are that shape (well, not the lopsided part), and i never have enough black socks to wear with my black shoes and black pants. I died my hair a non-permanent red, and it hasn't quite made it back to dirty blonde. Hopefully my face doesn't really look that much like Jay Leno's, but i do have a butt chin. And big hands (for a girl).